It’s still raw. So when she called and asked me to go with her on an overnight winery get away, I said yes. I was worried that she was going to tell me she was ill. I think she tries to compensate for the problems she caused.
This was a mistake. It isn’t her fault that I’m freaking out. Or maybe it is.
Flashbacks are hard to get through. They’re harder when the enabler is in the room. Among other types of memories that makes me worse… I feel so sick. I haven’t slept over 2 hours a night for five days. I have tried to reach out tonight but there’s nobody around tonigjt.
The intensity of my loneliness is overwhelming.