I read the book on Toxic Parents years ago. I recently realized that I’m a toxic person. I don’t mean to be. I only want good things for others but I’m a Debbie downer or negative Nelly or whatever phrase you prefer.
I have nothing to offer anymore. I’m not physically capable of much. I’m just existing. Why? I can’t do anything on my own.. If I had something to contribute maybe I could be worthy of things like basic health care. But I’m not. Most Americans agree that I’m not or we wouldn’t have a unified government working to take it away.
I didn’t want to wake up. I didn’t actively try not to. I could have turmed my insulin pump off. I could’ve done a big shot of insulin that would have been way too much. I didn’t because I’m too afraid of hurting the people who I love. I wish they’d been that concerned about protecting me as I’ve always been about protecting them.
**this relapse brought to me by the #metoo movement**